I am terrified of driving. No really.
Most people I know couldn't wait to get behind the wheel of a car. They were studying for their permit the moment they turned 15 and by the time they were 16, they had it in their hands. Some of my high school companions actually went to the dmv for their birthday so they could stat learning. Most people cannot wait to get as many hours in the car as they can. They drive circles in parking lots for a day, then they're off learning the roads of their town. By 18 most people get their driver's license.
I'll be 28 this year.
I've never once thought that driving would be a good thing. I was terrified of it since I was little and that only intensified in high school when we were shown trauma videos. Ever since I could remember I've been haunted with nightmares of driving off of cliffs, having to be the one to drive my family away from danger, or having the driver pass out behind the wheel. I've had nightmares of running over pets, people, or driving into rivers. It's childish and illogical but the thought of driving has always been more terrifying than facing down an angry dog.
But this is apparently the year of "shut up and do it". I studied for the test for months and this past week, I finally got my driving permit. Honestly? Driving is HORRIBLE. Everything that moves scares me. A car slowly rolling out of a parking lot? Scary. A two lane road? A NIGHTMARE. Someone passing? OMG IT'S COMING FOR ME OMG WHAT. I'm not kidding, I cannot wrap my mind around driving. My first big drive was along the back roads coming from a small farming town to my home town. At night. I learned something important- I can barely see at night time. The lights from other people's cars blind me, I have a hard time judging distance, and I cannot keep straight. The second big drive was down the main road to the store. I did better- but I still bumped into the concrete barrier around the local coffee shop.
Sometimes I wish we never left the horse and buggy era. I know it's honestly the most immature thing to be afraid of, that I'm limiting myself with this fear, and that I'll eventually learn how to do it but I cannot see myself ever enjoying driving. I'm doing it because I feel it's something I need to do but there's a reason I've not driven until now. If there was honestly any way I could live the rest of my life without having to own and operate a car I'd be completely and totally okay with that. Realistically? It's just something I'm going to have to learn. I may never get over the discomfort, but hopefully I'll learn. Any prayers for safety and peace would be appreciated.
This past weekend I got to meet up with a long time artistic hero and friend of mine, Adele. I've followed her work since high school and her books kept me company during a very difficult time of my life. I was inspired to find another strong Christian artist who held the same convictions about her artwork that I did. It was encouraging to see that someone could overcome hostility and adversity for being firm in her beliefs, for publishing her stories, and for improving leaps and bounds. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't inspired by her in my own work. Meeting her in person was a great honor. I'm a little late in saying it, but thank you for the meeting and the years of inspiration and encouragement.
Happy Belated Birthday! Keep strong in the Lord , he'll continue to bless you and your work.
Finally, I'll be going completely AWOL starting this Friday. Every year, I'm blessed with a week in the company of my best friend. This year we'll be trying to avoid the heat by...going to another state that's much hotter than mine. Well. We're going swimming in a river and hopefully panning for some gold flakes. It's fun stuff and honestly, just knowing that I get to hang out with the person that's kept me sane since high school is more exciting than I can express. All year I save up for the trip and we both sit and plan out what we're going to do. When times are hard, I look forward to the summer when we'll be able to talk face to face again. At this point, she's become part of the family. Everyone looks forward to picking her up from the Airport and taking her to our traditional lunch at a New York style pizza place. Everyone makes time to come and see her. She's got such a unique and strong little spirit.
I'll not be spending any time online. I only get to spend a precious week with my DLF a year and I'd rather not be distracted.
And for any that are curious or just like my shabby sketches, I upload more frequently to my sketchblog. Most of these sketches will never see the light of DA because...they're daily doodles. The better ones make it on my 'not dead' sketch dumps but I only scan them in about once a month. The quality isn't great, most sketches I snap from my cell phone but if you're bored or a gluton for bad art, you can check out my sketchblog here: thalsketches.blogspot.com/
God bless you guys!Doing art...Adoptables?
You can purchase adoptables done by me on this alternate account. My rules and guidelines still apply and the content is very random. Just because...
"Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You too? I thought I was the only one."
"I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else."
"The Christian does not think God will love us because we are good, but that God will make us good because He loves us."
"If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that we were made for another world."
"We are not necessarily doubting that God will do the best for us; we are wondering how painful the best will turn out to be."
"What draws people to be friends is that they see the same truth. They share it."
C.S. LewisCommissions & Trades I'm waiting on:
Some of these are pretty recent but there are a few that are slowly gathering dust. I'm leaving them up as a reminder to myself (and hopefully the other artists involved).
At this point...these sit here as "Buyer Bewares":
Two character full body lineart from
- My end of the trade is complete as of September 14, 2009
Five Chibis from
- Paid on December 29,2012 | 1/5 received |Latest ParaChiMar Artwork: Legacy of Para group on DA!
and myself decided it's about time we start up a group for ParaChiMar: The Legacy of Para. For those interested this group is pretty much just a good place to dump all of our LoP artwork, trades, commissions, and fanart into. I've also made a small stamp collection to celebrate. Check us out. :3My buddies & Artistic Icons: ClubsReligion & Politics: "Fandoms"
a Role Playing